Ouch, this film cut me deep, real deep! For starters the storyline is about as predictable as the alphabet and by the time the first 30 mins have passed all you wanna do is get out of there before your head explodes from having to listen to nicole kidmans dirty rotten southern accent again. I mean i thought i should have been wearing safety goggles or something. Anyway, here's the hundred million dollar question: Was the big fat woman up the front crying cos (a) [SPOILER] jude law got killed [/SPOILER] or (b) her popcorn supply ran out. Think i'll go with the popcorn, cos honestly who really gave a cr*p that he died anyway. "Come back to me, come back to cold mountain"... how's about we don't! and hows about hollywood set up some sort of agency to kill or at least fine people that pollute the world with this sort of sh*t! Infact this is probably a case for greenpeace cos this film stank with a capital S-T-A-N-K!!!
"Something bad's brewing at Miramax. To the batmobile!"
